Be anxious about nothing.....

Ever been nervous? I mean, really, really nervous?

I used to label myself as one giant nerve ending. Everything bothered me, everything scared me, everything offended me. I can remember several instances where I was the most nervous....

- Every first day of school. I can remember all the way back to first grade. My "first days of school" were not just in August, however. Since I was a PK AND an army brat, I often had to move in the middle of a school year, making it another "first day" of another kind. The smell of elementary schools still sometimes makes my belly do a flip-flop.
- My ballet recitals. Even though I wasn't center stage in my troupe, I was still ON stage. I worried about whether the masking tape was still marking off the stage floor to help us find our places. I worried what I'd do if my tights and tu-tu itched so much I just HAD to scratch. I worried my headpiece would go flying into the audience if I twirled too fast (it happened to a friend of mine). Those 30 seconds standing behind the curtains on the sides seemed like eternity.
- Flying. I've only flown twice in my life (two round-trip trips, I mean)....when I was 11, then again on our honeymoon. Joking aside, I did not eat anything more than crackers for three days up until this event. On the plane, I ordered ginger ale. Dramamine was my dearest friend. (Although now I see that the butterflies in my stomach were not from air sickness, but from the fear of it.)
- Graduation. I was fine for my high school graduation. Yet for my college graduation, I was a big, burly ball of nerves. I remember trying to sit still during the speech, telling myself I was NOT going to shake the president's left hand by accident, that I COULD walk without falling in these heels, and that I was NOT going to throw up on my diploma. I didn't.
- Our wedding. Again, I assumed temporary anorexia as the day neared. By the time I was down the aisle and by Ken's side, I was totally calm at last.....but very, very hungry.
- Preparing for childbirth. Oh, man, it hits you. Some women get nervous a couple of months ahead. I was too busy to be nervous....until my contractions began. Then I realized "there's no turning back now." A flagrant hater of all things hospital, I knew I was in for the unexpected.

Some psychologists say that nervous energy is good.....it spurs us on to greater competence in the tasks we undertake. Maybe there's some proof to that.....I was the student who always made the best grades on the papers I hastily wrote the night before (or wee early morning hours). Some doctors say that anxiety deteriorates the body quicker....weakening the immune system and all that. I can attest to that one....where we used to live, I stayed sick while working a job I hated, living in constant anxiety around my boss.

The skyrocketing expenditures for anxiety medications show that this is not just a small problem....it's an epidemic. (I can also attest to this, seeing as I was one of these statistics just a few short years ago.) No way to live....if you can even call it "living."

Jesus says so many things about anxiety and stress. I think He mentioned certain things more often (like money, and like worry, too) that He meant for us to take very seriously, this being one of them. He created our bodies; we belong to Him. If stress truly weakens and destroys our bodies, then we are, in effect, destroying His temples.

He pleads with us, calls to us to relinquish all of our doubts and cares to Him. Why don't we? Because we are too busy. We are told by everyone that we're SUPPOSED to feel nervous about something. We are too prideful to release our grasp over our situation, to pry our white knuckles from it and let Him have it (in Whose hands, all things turn to gold).

I still struggle with anxious thoughts. I still worry sometimes (okay, many a time). Yet saying that "I'm human" is no excuse for this pattern. Yes, He "remembers that we are dust." Yet He commands us to surrender every ounce of our lives over to His control....even the things we battle over in our hearts. God has brought me far, though, in this area.....I still tend to freak out sometimes, but I have learned more about what it means to truly rest in him.

Ahhh....rest. It is a word used less and less often in our soceity today. To say it outloud....no, to follow it, is refreshing to the body and to the soul. Jesus did it. Why don't we?

It’s easy to say, "Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him" (Psalm 37:7) until our own little world is turned upside down and we are forced to live in confusion and agony like so many other people. Is it possible to "rest in the Lord" then? If this "Do not" doesn’t work there, then it will not work anywhere. This "Do not" must work during our days of difficulty and uncertainty, as well as our peaceful days, or it will never work. And if it will not work in your particular case, it will not work for anyone else. Resting in the Lord is not dependent on your external circumstances at all, but on your relationship with God Himself. (Oswald Chambers)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Blueberry Bliss

Part of the "Lost" madness.....